To be desired was my only wish.
It's the meaning of your name.
Surely, you understand.
I asked God a question I now regret.
He gave me your face
And never your breath.
Instead, I looked from afar
As you glowed with such an elegance
That I melted like ice cream in the sun.
How I wished you licked me before I fell in love,
Tasted of my goodness before I hit the concrete surface
And baked under the rays of your beauty.
Such a happy death.
I had a line; a moral code,
And you were someone I would’ve never chosen.
Slow to believe, I hesitated to snatch you:
That coarse, dark hair you either kept straight or in curls;
That hourglass frame you loved your clothes to hug;
That soul-pleasing smile to match your captivating eyes.
You are a beauty unmatched, but I could see you were lost,
Feeding into the foolishness that plagued me so.
But still, seeing you with someone else only sickened me.
I had to pick the lesser of two evils and I chose neither.
This is why I don’t get to decide the promises of my life.
I leave such things in God’s hands.
Because I’m most likely to mess up my own plans,
And miss out on such a beautiful woman
If you’re out there, and the last guy finally messed up,
Return to my life and I will give you my all.
Not because I chose to, but God demands it.
It may not make much sense, but I trust His faithfulness.
He would not lead me to someone who is unworthy.
If you ever doubt my commitment, think of His goodness,
And realize that the God who made me the man I am today
Is the One who chose you so very long ago.
Even in His death, He did not make a mistake.
He was perfect in His life and is my wisest counselor.
If you don’t trust me, trust Him.
Don’t make the same mistake I made,
And delay our happiness yet another half a decade.